I found myself staring at a woman. It’s as if I have been staring at her for the longest time in my life but I didn’t know when it started. Her eyes were lovely, out-of-this-world and familiar…
She was also staring at me. Her eyebrows showed curiosity and anger. Why?
I found it hard to separate my eyes from hers but I did. I was scanning her face and it really…looked like “her.”
I closed my weary eyes. Was it really her? Was it really the “her?” If it was her, why am I here? Why is she staring at me like she could see me? Maybe she does really see me or am I just dreaming? My desperate self is really out-of-line now. I think I’m going crazy – profoundly crazy – for being so desperate like this.
I decided to open these weary eyes and dreamy mind – silently hoping that this was really real, that this was not a creation of my desperate self and that she truly could see me.
She was still looking at me – my heart pounding like it always did whenever I see her. And finally she spoke with irritation in her voice, “What is the matter with you?”
I did not mean to irritate her – I mean, how did this even happen? I liked how this is happening but I did not like how we should have met for the first time. She is irritated and my voice could not find its escape.
She spoke again, irritation still in her voice, “Hey?! I do not want to judge you this hard but are you stalking me???” Stalking? I was not! I do not know why I am here, looking at you, standing in front of you! I am…lost. This is all new to me. Please don’t be angry. I…am sorry for staring at you.
“Mister, you cannot talk?” Stupid…me.
I finally responded, “So..rry. I…I did not mean to sta…stare. I…my…eyes are not at its functional state.” Functional state?! What excuse was that?
“Oh…sorry mister. I thought you were staring. Are you lost?” She actually believed that. She is too trusting and I am such a liar but a good one at that. Sighs. I should just go with it – she would not see me after this anyways. I’m going back after this. Who sent me here anyways? I did not ask for it…?
“I…yes…am lost,” lost in many ways.
“Can I be of any help, mister? Sorry about my attitude earlier, I…I was just…” She looked at me with a sad smile. Oh no! I made her sad what should I do?
“I’m the o-one w-who should a-a-apologize.” Yes, that is right. “I am s-so-sorry for unintentionally s-staring at you.” And finally, I gave her a smile.
“Oh, nothing to worry about! I get that a lot but not the kind like yours.” She scoffed and gave me a tight smile. I nodded in reply.
“And yeah, you did not answer my question. Do you need any help? If you are lost then maybe you need one?” A perfect opportunity to walk with her! The problem is, where should I head to?
“Y-yes. I need to find my way home.”
“Do you know where it is?”
I slowly, hesitantly, raised my arms and pointed to the right. “There.”
“Are you sure? You could not see mister and I am not quite sure if you’re right about that direction. I could be of help though. Here,” she grabbed my wrist and pulled me softly as she walked towards the opposite direction, “I think you belong to where we are going.”
The way she grabbed my wrist was cautious – like holding something you might destroy, like she was used to grabbing things always with force. I could only remember her face or how she looked when I was still looking at her from a distance but I could not remember who or what she was. This could be a dream because if it isn’t then I should have remembered everything about her – what she does, where she spends her time, who were with her and why she was like this – but I could not. This must be a dream.
I stopped walking and took my arm back, “Where are we going?”
“Look, we are almost there. Trust me. I am sure they could help. They are like you.”
“Like me?” Before I protested, she grabbed my wrist and walked faster.
Then this is a dream. If my friends are here then this must be a dream. I should just follow her.
I realized, at this moment, I was walking side by side with her. Just like how I wished. Brother was correct – “dreams occur when a wish is too hard to fulfill and somehow gives you happiness even if it isn’t true. It’s one way for us to be happy and sad afterwards. At least, we had it fulfilled in some way.”
I could not help but smile. Even though this was temporary, I was happy.